An Email from Heaven

My Mom asked me a while back to try to edit the eulogy I gave at Dad's memorial service down to one page so that she could frame it.  That sounded good in theory, but turned out to be impossible in practice--there was simply too much that I didn't want to delete--so no matter how I tried, I couldn't carve it down to one page of copy.

Instead, yesterday I gave her a framed poem I wrote during the middle of one of my long, contemplative nights a while back.  I'm sharing it here in the hope that anyone who is grieving the loss of a loved one may be encouraged.

One of the things I've missed most about Dad being gone is that every day I received email from him.  Usually he just forwarded things that he thought were funny or profound, but occasionally he wrote a personal note and I've saved most of them in a file called "Stuff from Daddy".  I imagined recently an email exchange between us and thought it might go something like this:

Sometimes we miss the best of life’s gifts, sometimes we fail to see

The blessings in front of the nose on our face, and that’s what happened to me.

Sometimes we argued and disagreed, but he loved me regardless for certain

And if my selfish flesh could have just one more wish, I’d ask God to draw back the curtain.

If the veil was removed that separates us, or he could send one more email or two

I have to believe if he sent one today, it’d say:

“Sandy, all of it’s true!

Your life there on earth’s a rehearsal, the best day down there can’t compare

There’s no more pain, no sorrow, no sickness, not even a hint of despair

Colors before unknown to me more brilliant than you can conceive

And love overwhelming envelopes us here in a way that you wouldn’t believe.

I love you, and look forward to seeing you all, but now I’m finally free

From all earthly chains that bind and restrain, so don’t feel sad for me.

This is what we’re created for, communion with God unbroken

So until our sweet reunion some day, my love for you all is unspoken.

Carry it still with you in your hearts, until that precious day

That we meet again on these golden streets, when you will hear me say…

‘Welcome home. I love you.’”

And I love you, too, Daddy.

Always,

Sandy

Blues Blessings

I have to confess that I haven't felt much like writing lately. The purpose of this blog after all is to inspire, not depress, yet daily moments of melancholy have become my new normal this holiday season.

Anytime things change (whether for good or for bad) emotional wrestling matches ensue.  Long ago, I learned that the messages I choose to believe must be measured by their congruence and agreement with scripture. For this reason, each time a thought of Tiffany or memories of my Dad invade my mind, I choose to refuse to be overcome by grief, instead reminding myself that they would not return if they could and are both enjoying all the blessings of heaven promised to those who faithfully trust Christ as Lord.

I am thankful for Christmas and all of the delights and joys that have accompanied its celebration throughout my lifetime, but this year, my thankfulness exceeds all years past in spite of my sorrow.  Knowing that Christ's coming into the world brought with it the chance for us to experience eternal life and a future that never includes the painful good-byes associated with this particular year of my life is reason to rejoice, to celebrate and to commemorate.

My prayer is that each person who reads this, especially those who grieve the loss of loved ones during the holidays, are able to overcome the blues with the blessing of this comforting promise from 1 Thessalonians 4: ¹³ Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. ¹⁴ For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Yesterday, I could say HAPPY Thanksgiving and mean it, because it was.  And although in a perfect world (the way things were originally planned by our loving, benevolent God) there would be no sad good-byes and world peace would be a reality, I chose happiness because of the promise that one day things will be as He intended. On that day, there will be no more sorrows, no more tears, no more sickness and no more good-byes.

So, at the intersection of Gratitude and Grief, my precious memories, amazing friends, and wonderful family--along with the promise of reunions in heaven--sustain, soothe, and comfort me, and I am thankful, so very thankful to Christ, my Lord.

Revelation 21:4-7

Reflections...Daddy's Little Piece of Heaven on Earth--the cove I love.

As autumn hues transform Lake Norman’s shores, the fireworks and picnics of summer make way for bonfires and blankets. It’s bittersweet in some ways, but I welcome the reprieve from this year’s heat.

Summer’s end at the lake usually evokes memories of the first time I saw On Golden Pond. I was twenty-two when the Oscar winner hit theaters, and already waxing nostalgic about my childhood, it stirred recollection of my own futile attempts to catch Walter in our golden cove in Sherrills Ford.

Years later, I recall other aspects of the film that may be more compelling than its majestic scenery: the complexity of relationships between parents and children, the exhilaration of shared adventures, the brevity of life.

Few things motivate us to ponder such matters more than the loss of a loved one, and having recently said, “See you later,” to the man I called Daddy, I hope what I’m about to share will encourage you to consider today’s opportunity.

My dad was old school. Undaunted by most challenges, after fighting in the Korean War he came home and started a business, learned to fly airplanes, built houses, and founded a private school. None of these accomplishments were a significant part of the legacy he wanted to pass on, however. What mattered to him was leaving a heritage of fierce faith and limitless love.

Daddy loved to talk, so he did. The greeter at Walmart knew him by name. The pharmacist at the drug store, the lab tech at the doctor’s office, the waitress at his favorite Japanese restaurant, his dry cleaner’s employees, the customers at my sister’s store, and so many others around the lake knew he loved them.

It seemed to me that Daddy didn’t recall a time when the clock had been his master and he reminded me often that he thought I needed to slow down. I justified my busyness but recognized that I often allowed the tyranny of the urgent to take precedence over important and occasionally, it haunted me.

Standing at Daddy’s bedside during his last days this summer, time stood still. Schedules, meetings, appointments and deadlines didn’t matter so much anymore, I just wanted to hear him tell me about the time he and his brother’s went skinny dipping in Lane’s Creek one more time. Instead, he pulled me close and whispered again that he was proud of me and that he loved me.

Today, as bronze and yellow leaves reflect fall’s glory in the waters of Dad's golden cove, I’m reminded of the man who built the house on the hill above the shoreline I love, and I miss him. But oh how precious it is when sorrow is soothed by the awareness that I won life’s lottery when God chose to give me a father who seized every opportunity to say, “I love you.”

If you read this with sadness thinking you weren't as fortunate remember this, the PERFECT Father who loves unconditionally is eager to adopt you. "If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved." Romans 10:9

Sweet Little Blessings

It's that time of year in my family again.  We're celebrating births and birthdays!

Steven Pate joined the family on Friday and we couldn't be more excited to have a beautiful boy join the clan.

The Gompers' Girls turned two and three and enjoyed being the recipients of presents and cakes! There are few things more fun than watching a child delight in being celebrated!

And now...we wait until Friday to celebrate one more precious little one! Our youngest granddaughter, Cadence, is about to turn 1 and we cannot wait to celebrate what she means to us!

Fun times, God's blessings, Grateful heart.

To Tell the Truth...or not.

Reading scripture in the order it was written gives new perspective to me as I consider the unfolding of events in a fresh way. 

The prophet Amos was given a difficult message to convey, but his unwavering obedience to speak the "hard to hear" truth is challenging to me on several levels.

The first is that we seem to be living in a time when confessing Christ-followers are prone to mistake the mandate to demonstrate Christ's love with the imperative to be silent about sin, specifically regarding issues that contradict the undisputed doctrines of our Christian faith.

When King Jeraboam heard through one of the priests (Amaziah) that Amos was foretelling God's plan to punish Israel for her sin, Amos found out quickly that he wasn't on the king's most popular people list.  Here's Amaziah's message to Amos:

Amos 7: 12...“Get out of here, you prophet! Go on back to the land of Judah, and earn your living by prophesying there! 13 Don’t bother us with your prophecies here in Bethel. This is the king’s sanctuary and the national place of worship!”14 But Amos replied, “I’m not a professional prophet, and I was never trained to be one.I’m just a shepherd, and I take care of sycamore-fig trees. 15 But the Lord called me away from my flock and told me, ‘Go and prophesy to my people in Israel.’ 16 Now then, listen to this message from the Lord...

Amos did not back down from the directive he'd been given by God to warn the people of what was to come if they didn't wake up.

Today, there are times when I sense a subtle (or not so subtle) expectation to just be quiet, "to go back to Judah," so to speak, rather than sharing that there is a Holy God who is the same today as yesterday and His standards have never changed. 

I fear imbalance. I imagine that a group of well-intentioned Christians who carried out their mission with misguided methods and sometimes sloppy scholarship have ushered in this era of confusion. Not desiring to be associated with one of the hateful, judgmental bigot types (who would?) many believers today have adopted an, "I'll just love my neighbor to Christ," modus operandi.  Scripture is clear.  Love is unquestionably commanded, but it is "hearing" God's Word (Romans 10:17) that leads to believing faith. But let's face it, that's not always an easy assignment because as John Maxwell says, "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."

I confess honestly though, that if I'd never heard about sin, I'd have remained ignorant of the fact that I was in need of salvation and that I was helpless to save myself, regardless of how lovingly compassionate the bearer of that painful truth was.

What it all boils down to, at least as I see it, is that love in its highest, most genuine form is evidenced by a willingness to tell the whole truth (lovingly) even though it may be scoffed at or rejected. Why?  Because the eternal and unchanging Word has the power to yield believing faith .

G.K. Chesterton once said, "Tolerance is the virtue of the man without convictions," but Gerhard Forde drove it home when he stated, "Christianity is not the movement from vice to virtue but from virtue to grace." And grace truly is, amazing.

Today's Reading: Amos 6-9; 2 Chronicles 27 Isaiah 9-12

Joy Comes in the Morning...

Awake for hours...sleepless, sad, I finally read and remember.  Daddy is more alive now than I am.  Joy, refreshing as water from a clear mountain stream, washes over my broken heart again and I am grateful, so grateful, for the Word of my sweet Lord.

1 Thessalonians 4
The Hope of the Resurrection
13 And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. 14 For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died.


 15 We tell you this directly from the Lord: We who are still living when the Lord returns will not meet him ahead of those who have died. 16 For the Lord himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First, the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. 17 Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. Then we will be with the Lord forever. 18 So encourage each other with these words.